thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Randomize