sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
Watching her eat just hurts me
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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