You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
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