The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Randomize
