I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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