My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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