think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize
