you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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