you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Randomize
