Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
she smelled like a LAN party
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Randomize
