He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
