it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
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