Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
