Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
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