gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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