i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
