it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize