dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
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