why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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