PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
Randomize