How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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