yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize