I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
