put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
What a dumb baby whore.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
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