I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Randomize
