singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
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