Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
