He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
