all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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