Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Randomize
