Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Randomize
