I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize
