Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Randomize
