Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
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