google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
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just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
you didnt know i had herpes?
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
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He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
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