I smell stomach acid.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
