Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
