I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
