I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
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