So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Randomize
