Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
she pinky promised me she was 18
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
