Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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