I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Randomize
