I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Randomize