i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Randomize