Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Randomize
