Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
These 25 Rude People Ruined Movies for Everyone Else
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
23 Cringeworthy Responses to “I Love You”
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.