you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Life is so much better after having sex.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Randomize
