Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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