somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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