I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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